Saturday, July 14, 2007

Why do I suspect that's NOT powdered sugar on your nose?

Last night I was in a public restroom minding my own business in the stall when I hear a few soft snorting noises coming from the stall next to me. Immediately I was taken back to the summer I lived in London and smiled as I remembered my shock upon hearing those same noises for the first time in the bathrooms of the drug-infested dance clubs I went to occasionally. I suddenly heard some very loud, forceful snorts and then a nasty cough-sneeze and looked down in horror to see blood spattered all over the floor of my neighboring stall. Before I could make up my mind to yell out in disgust or peek under the stall wall to look for signs of an overdose I heard her toilet flush and saw her walk out of the stall as if nothing had happened. I looked at her in grotesque awe as she casually walked away from the blood-splattered floor and left the bathroom.

So remember kids: Be cool, stay in school. And don't do drugs. If you do, you'll wind up like some nasty woman sneezing blood all over the floor of a public restroom.

11 comments:

Jeremy said...

Was this the public restroom at Arby's? Damn cokehead sandwich-wanters!

Aaron said...

That's pretty hot.

Jen said...

That is so utterly disgusting. I guess there are all kinds of blood on the floor in women's restrooms.

Elizabeth said...

Eww! Jen's comment is gross, but so true.

This is nasty! But I'm jealous...I've never heard anyone snorting coke in the ladies room. Or maybe I just need to pay more attention.

Aliecat said...

Holy Jesus! She needs to get her ass to church...or rehab...

lesley said...

Jeremy, it was actually in a pretty swanky place...I don't know if that makes me more or less surprised to hear the coke snorting..

Aaron, I know. She was one sexy mama.

Jen, I'm now sort of curious to take a Q-Tip swab of a restroom floor and see what you find traces of. On second thought, no.

Elizabeth, usually people are much more subtle I think. I have faith that you'll hear it one day, though.

Alie, yes and yes.

jeffhellenbrand said...

wait a minute. didn't she learn in kindergarten that it's especially important to wash your hands after sneezing a mixture of blood and coke onto the bathroom floor? especially important. unless you make sure not to sneeze on your hands, i guess. i'm just giving her the benefit of the doubt here.

Loops O'Fury said...

That is sofuckinggross. I hope it went all over her shoes.

Abysmal Chick said...

I once saw a girl snort coke off a baby changing table in Perkins. VERY GLAMOROUS! (no babies were harmed in this snort session)

Hedy De Vine said...

i've never been lucky enough to witness that either.

also, i can't believe she didn't clean up after herself! what a slob.

jeffhellenbrand said...

yeah, hedy. usually all i wanna do is clean after a session like that...